HDR can be difficult to get right, and that's not to say anyone is perfect at it at all.
I think this displays a confusing range of tones, almost like you've used a flash light to light up a few areas. Lol
IMO, I would try and even the tones throughout the frame so that it feels more 'true'.
I for one Rob, am the last person you'll ever know to refuse the route of experimental for whatever shape or form it may be.
So I applaud you for displaying your experimental efforts, and a good word of advice would be to never abandon your courageous and intrigued mind..... For what ever reason...
Great composition though, I'll give you that.